


A Tale That Can't be Told

by waldorph



Series: giddy whirl [3]
Category: Glee
Genre: F/M, Future Fic, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-13
Updated: 2009-12-13
Packaged: 2017-10-04 09:54:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waldorph/pseuds/waldorph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>See, the thing is?  Now there's a baby, and college applications, and shit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Tale That Can't be Told

**Author's Note:**

> written for **snarky-kat** and **kitiara1304**

"Okay, see, here is the thing," Artie says flatly, "licking."

"Not in front of the baby!" Finn hisses, but whatever, dude, Holly is totally too young to even know what's up (named after Holly Golightly, because Quinn went through a phase and now all the girls say things like, "It should take you exactly four seconds to cross from here to that door. I'll give you two," because they're _batshit_. But what, Holly is totally better than "Drizzle").

"Dude, what?" Matt demands, because Matt is a fuckhead who has never experienced the bliss of a chick tightening her legs around your head because she's coming _again_. Fucking prude.

"I am for it," Mike says, because he is cool. It deserves a bump, and so Puck gives him one.

Kurt huffs.

Kurt is a little bitch.

"Cocks get licked too, sweetheart," Puck informs him. It's a new game: Kurt gets really unnerved when Puck refuses to be flustered by the flaming faggy-ness of Kurt's existence. Puck has a dick: he knows what feels good. He's pretty fucking sexually aware, okay?

Plus, he's got a girlfriend who has crazy tabs going on in Safari on articles like "How to Give Great Head" and "His Anus And Blowjobs: AMAZING" and "Do this Position" and "How to Do Kagels." She's got about a billion Cosmos, too. And watches waaaaaay more porn than he was lead to believe chicks did.

She's got a startling affection for gay porn, and then looks at him and says, "So, they seem to be enjoying that, would you?"

He draws the line at dildos, but hell yes to fingering, man (okay, so it's probably only a matter of time before she really starts harping on the pegging thing, but he just… can't quite get there, okay? Because it's seriously hard to "no homo" when your girlfriend who looks like she might break if you push her too hard is fucking your ass. There's just no way to come back from that, man).

He's doomed, because she does things like walk into his bedroom in her what, granny skirts and Britney circa-pre crazy shit stockings and says, "I think it's important that I master the blowjob. I realize you haven't complained and have often voiced the opinion that you just enjoy getting your dick sucked—which is so crude, but not the point—but I would like to become a proficient. Please drop your pants and sit on the side of your bed."

That right there had been almost as good as the week she discovered bondage by clicking links and decided she would like to experiment with him holding her down and brutally fucking her.

Turns out that? That worked.

Not the point.

"Lay off of him," Finn says. "God, Puck."

"Jealous is fucking ugly on you, bra," he informs him.

"No, what? You are a Jew. No "bra" for you, you are not a brotha," Mat says flatly.

"That's fucking anti-Semitism."

"Oh my god," Artie laughs. "It's like Rachel fucked a brain into you."

And that shit? That is why Artie is awesome.

"No, seriously, though," Artie says. "I mean, where do you…you know?"

That's how Mike and Puck end up explaining how to go down on a chick while Matt pussies up with Kurt and Finn goes bright red (but dude is listening, totally) and Artie listens like his life could depend on this.

Tina is a lucky girl.

* * *

She kept the baby.

Mr. Schue offered to go through adoption stuff, but by the time she was in her eighth month it was like… there'd just been no way.

She'd fuckin' moved in with Rachel. Well. Okay, so shit happened like this:

"Shut up," Rachel had said when Quinn called, sitting up and he groaned, let his hands slide from her thighs. He bucked up in her, just to be an asshole. She bit her lip and then glared at him. He thumbed her clit, and she ground down on him and then squeezed.

He laughed.

"Wait—no, of course you can stay here— you have to! Quinn, you have to come stay here. Dad and Daddy won't mind—no, be quiet, of course. Just- when can you b-be here?" There was a pause. He couldn't believe that she hasn't pulled off of him, that he was still deep inside her while she fucking arranged to be sisters with Quinn, who was about ten seconds from killing Finn. "Sure, yeah. An hour is fine." She hung up and then looked at him.

He looked at her. "You just adopted Quinn."

"Dad and Daddy won't—"

He'd rolled her, grinning down at her and snapping his hips into her, driving his cock hard and deep to watch her back arch.

"Yeah, okay, we can talk later," she agreed. They were done in like, five minutes, but whatever. And apparently, he could add "exhibitionism" to the list of kinky shit Rachel's into.

…Yeah. So then Quinn moved in with Rachel, which saved her relationship with Finn, who is seriously still so stupid, and they were all this weird…weird family.

Weird for Ohio, more fitted for like, the East coast or California—you know, seriously liberal places where the queers live and the feminists are like, trying to redefine the family unit and Jesus Christ he has got to stop reading shit Rachel leaves lying around.

But like, Finn is the dad, but he's the father, and Quinn is irrevocably the mother but Rachel is like, weirdly in there somehow, and not just 'cause he's fucking her. No, it's like Rachel's the aunt, and Quinn's big sister, 'cause Quinn can be just… an unbelievable terror, but Rachel is far more protective. Quinn won't stand up for what's right 'cause she's picking her battles and waiting it out; Rachel's fucking Joan of Arc, man.

Anyway.

So yeah, Quinn moved in with Rachel.

At the end of the school year she had the baby (they missed Nationals—but they had won Regionals, so put it in the win column) (okay, no, so it really went like this:

"I'm going into labor," Quinn says flatly. "Take me to the hospital."

"I—what?" he says, glancing around. "_What?_"

"Man up," Santana snaps. "You spermed, now you drive."

"I hate you so much," he tells her. "Seriously. What is it with you, for real?"), and they had the summer to figure things out.

And by they? Yeah, he means frickin' all of Glee.

There were _schedules_ for baby care. They bought diapers and Adam would sit, going through his files (lawyer- and dude makes shittons of money), and then look up every so often and shake his head and sometimes, on really weird occasions when Dan and Rachel were like, making master lists or schedules on white boards or helping Quinn plan out her whole fucking _life_, Puck would glance over and he'd share a moment of _what the fuck have we gotten into?_ with Adam.

Which is weird, because Adam hates Puck, and Puck is insolent around Adam (Rachel's word) and Dan's the cool one, but whatever.

 

And now school's started up. And the schedule is even more figured out. On A days, first period, Mercedes and Brittany have no classes, so they watch Holly. Second period goes to Artie, third is lunch so they all kind of take turns, third is Quinn and fourth is him.

On B days, first is Finn, second is Santana, third is, again, lunch, and fourth is Kurt and Mike and Matt.

And the thing is, shit doesn't have to go like that because Finn's mom keep saying she's more than happy to look after Holly, and Holly is like, unofficial mascot and Mr. Schue holds her during Glee.

"I just figured out what movie this is," Tina says as they're all waiting for Mr. Schue to come to rehearsals. He's dating Miss P, and they're taking things slow because he just finalized his divorce and she's a germphobe (and how does that even work, is he gonna have to like, lube up with antibacterial sanitizer and wow, does Puck need to stop thinking about this).

"No, no, you can't—look, I am _tellin'_ you that this shi—poop is just—" Mercedes is snapping at Rachel, with a glance at Holly, who is _six months_ and not gonna give a fuck about swearing before going back to Rachel, whose eyes narrow and lips pout and Kurt rolls his eyes dramatically like a wild pony as he clutches his chest.

"Yeah, what?" Santana asks. She's enjoying being lead CheeriO. Probably was for the best; she watches out for the CheeriOs, and Quinn stays on top of the school's hierarchy. Sylvester has been remarkably subdued: she only broke Brian Gilligan's arm when she threw him down the stairwell instead of breaking his neck.

And Principal Figgens suspended her. Again. It's kind of awesome.

"_Saved!_," Tina announces. "You know, the Mandy Moore, Jena Malone, Macauley Culkin, and whatsit, Susan Sarandon's daughter. You _know_."

"Eva Amurri," Santana says as Brittany brushes her hair. There is some serious bi-curious fucking going on there. Brittany's dumb as rocks, but he bets she's into kinky shit.

"We are not _Saved!_," Rachel says firmly. "For starters, Finn is not gay."

"Actually, it'd be Puck," Artie says, and then sighs when Puck looks at him. "Dude. It's actually a really funny movie."

"So, everyone have their song prepared?" Schue asks when he walks in, smacking his hands together. "We're gonna take Nationals this year, you guys! Hey, Holly. Hi, pretty girl," he coos, beaming and taking her from Quinn, who smiles at him.

* * *

"I think we're not going to tell her," Quinn says, watching Holly play on the bed. Rachel's downstairs fretting about college applications with her parents, and so Puck's up here, leaning in Quinn's door. "I mean, you can be Uncle Puck, or Noah or whatever, but—" she shakes her head. "It's too complicated, and I don't want to be responsible for everyone's lives. You and Rachel—"

"I'm not marrying the diva. This is not that movie." God, he can't even—no fucking way.

"No," she agrees with a smile. "And I won't marry Finn. I can't be Schue and his wife, but we can figure that out later, but—" she shrugs. "I want bigger than this town, and I want bigger than my life for her."

He looks at her, then at Holly. "Yeah," he agrees. The idea of Holly getting knocked up at sixteen by a drunk douche is just… someday he will be armed, and he'll come after the boy.

* * *

The rest of the school doesn't know what to do with them. They're still terrified of Quinn, and Santana is a BAMFILF, and Matt and Puck and Mike and Finn are still on the football team, but there's a baby in the mix.

And half the school thinks she's Finn's and half thinks she's Puck's and half thinks she's Artie's, which, what?

Wait, that was too many halves.

Anyway.

And then there are the rumors that Quinn and Rachel are lesbian lovers, which, you know, if they ever wanted to role play Puck would totally be down with that.

But mostly…

It's like, he's checking out of high school. He knows what he wants to do, and he's got a kid, kinda, and he's got a girlfriend and a babymamma and a best friend and it's fucking… ridiculous, but he doesn't give a shit about being popular.

Because the dickwads who are scribbling on yearbooks are going to be stuck in this fucking town for the rest of their lives.

And really, it should make him like, a slacker or something, but he kind of likes that he gets to smirk at the fuckheads and know he's better. That at their ten year reunion, he'll show up with a goddamn _life_ and they'll be painting lawns green. It's an even bigger rush than having fucked their moms.

He's so not a good person.

* * *

Now it's junior year, you know? And they're all applying to colleges, and getting writing samples in and trying to figure out what teachers they can ask to put recommendations together… he's got Schue and Miss P. Miss P says he should get one more academic, and not, like, Coach, but none of Puck's teachers _like_ him, so.

And then Mr. Dobbs, the English teacher who Puck's always kinda been okay with, hands him back his personal essay with "Come see me after class."

So Puck does, and Mr. Dobbs says things like, "The thing is, Puck, you have an extraordinary story to tell. You'd be first-generation college, and colleges and universities _love_ that, but you also have a daughter, and you're not married to the mother and you're trying to avoid the pitfalls of so many people in this town. The football theme is very generic, and it won't make many admissions boards look twice, but this… life that you're leading is a great story. I want you to redo the assignment, and once we have it polished I'll give it to Ms. Pillsbury with my letter of recommendation."

And Quinn is fretting and talking about Stanford and Harvard and MIT and UPenn's business programs- and god, she's going to be a CEO and like, rule the world.

But Finn… has no idea, you know? He's a decent leader, but he's _dumb_.

So Schue ends up bringing him all these brochures for like, artsy colleges where he can go train to be an actor or something. But Finn will go where Quinn goes, to be with her and Holly, and maybe that's okay, that that's how they'll be.

Matt wants to go to law school, Artie's going to go in for like, music composition or something, Mercedes is dead set on going to Hollywood and like, auditioning for American Idol, Tina wants to be a music teacher, Mike wants to write, like, books and shit.

Santana is going to law school, which is fucking terrifying, and Brittany… is going to marry rich, because that chick is dumb as shit.

He's got no idea what Kurt wants to do, except take it up the ass.

Thing is, they've got it figured out. Or at least they think they do, which isn't too different, not really.

And what he wants to do?

See, the thing is, he knows the guy at the recruitment center— fucked his sister, so.

But… Rachel would yell, and they might not be _forever_, but her yelling _matters_ to him.

And his mom would cry 'cause it's not being a rabbi or a lawyer but…

He gets really good grades in biology and science and his GPA isn't as low as you'd think (which just proves that this school is for _shit_ man, because he _skips all the time_ and still has a 3.3 GPA and two extracurriculars), and he doesn't have to go to a great school, you know? Just has to…

Look, he spends a lot of time on [goarmy.com](http://www.goarmy.com/amedd/medical/index.jsp) and [navy.com](http://www.navy.com/careers/healthcare/physicians/), looking at things like tuition assistance and… just. He thinks he could do that, patch guys up. Be a medic (okay, he watched Gen Kill and M*A*S*H and like Doom and all those movies, but he's not the kind of guy who can do a 9-5, and Grey's Anatomy makes him want to dig out his brain with a spoon up his nose, and that kind of ruined medicine for him.

He thinks he could do that.

Mr. Dobbs looks at him when he hands in the redone assignment and then smiles faintly and says, "Okay, Noah. Now what?"

And he listens, you know? Without like, the agenda of the guys on the other end of the phone calls he's been making, he just listens, and Miss P she just… listens.

And it's fucked up, you know, that he gets to _here_ and now's when teachers are kind of important, and maybe only three of them ('cause Schue is a badass— a secret BAMF, no lie), but.

Whatever, man. He's under a shitload of pressure.

So when Rachel sits down and says, "Are you really sure about this?" he wants to ask her what the fuck happened to just being _kids_ who sang all the time, and wants to tell her about the military part but can't, not really, because Rachel watches MSNBC and her dads are gay and she's really crazy-liberal, and Obama's president but she'll be weird, so he pussies out. But all he says, "Yeah, I kinda think I am."

Because he's kind of a badass, and he's the guy who comes in and picks up the pieces and he's not like, self-aware, not really, but he does know that about himself, and that he really kinda likes taking care of people: Glee, Rachel, Holly. He doesn't want to be a fucking dead end deadbeat like everyone this town churns out. Doesn't want to be that douche who paints the grass green.

And she nods and kisses him and says, "My dads will be so happy you're becoming a doctor. Both of them will write you letters, they said they would, if you needed them, because I know teachers don't really like you. Because you're very trying."

So the applications all go out, and then they all sit, and look at each other, and then OH MY GOD IT IS TIME FOR SECTIONALS ALMOST ALREADY WHAT WILL WE DO???????

Mostly Puck just sits with Artie and Quinn and Santana and they make faces at everyone else's insanity, but it works, yo. And then Artie leans over and says, "I want to do a cover of Zeppelin for my application—you up for vocals?"

Which is bull, because Artie outsings him, but they pick _Ramble On_ and Puck sings into Artie's fancy equipment and then, when they play it back, it sounds really cool, and Mr. Schue decides to pick it up and add it to the set list. And hey, this time? Sectionals go off without anyone cheating.

* * *

He gets acceptance letters to three of the seven schools in December, 'cause he went early admissions: picks Utica for his pre-med, enlists. It's done. He can relax, focus on the mess that is his life (and fucking hell, is it a mess).

But first he's got to tell Rachel, so, after Chrismukkah (he could kill that douche from the OC for that one), he tells her about the Navy. She's tucked against his side, and they've been dating for like, a year (which is _mind blowing_).

Rachel stares at him when he tells her, standing up and looking at him in horror. Dan is in the kitchen, but the faucet has suddenly stopped, and Adam's not muttering at all.

"You did what? You—there is a war in Iraq and Afghanistan and a not-so-secret war in Pakistan according to Ms. Rachel Maddow and you want to—"

"Be a medic, yeah. Which, I might add, is less crazy than your plan, which isn't college, is it, Rachel?"

And she's scary and tiny, but yeah, it's not. She'll get in and defer, audition on Broadway and hope she makes it. It's why he's going to a New York school, which is lame because they're not forever, they're just not—this isn't that movie.

She look sat him and then shakes her head. "Noah…"

"I want to do this. You're either on my side or you're not." It's an ultimatum, which is so She's All That and God, he has to stop letting Quinn and Rachel talk him in to sticking around for their movie marathons. But he's got a mother who's worth shit and this is his option, his…choice, and she should be on his fucking side.

He's been on hers, even when she's a psychotic diva, he's been on hers.

She looks at him. "I can't be around you right now. I think you need to go home."

"Yeah. Okay. Fine." He gets up, grabs his bag and slings it over his shoulder. "Whatever."

Dan follows him out.

"You enlisted?" he asks, breath white in the air between them. Shit, Puck left his coat inside. Oh well, whatever.

"Navy. They'll help me pay for med school and everything."

"You thought this through?"

"Yeah. I talked to some guys, you know the Joneses? Their oldest is an army medic, so I talked to them and…"

"She's just scared for you. You gotta… this is one of those things where when you're in a relationship, you've gotta weather it. I mean, this is a rough patch, and you either bail or you stay. That's really all relationships are, in the end, which is a secret Disney is trying to keep, but. I think you learned from your mistakes. I think that you got a girl pregnant and you're trying to do right now. And you got lucky that it was Quinn, because that girl is… oddly strong for someone whose parents watch Glenn Beck."

Puck shrugs and heads home. He could call her, but instead he calls Finn, and then Artie, and then all the guys (which does not include Kurt, but fucking Finn invites him anyway), and they watch Bruce Willis blow shit up.

* * *

They take Regionals in March. He and Rachel are still broken up, and whatever, he goes and fucks a few senior girls, but none of them are… Rachel.

Mr. Schue proposes to Miss P.

Rachel doesn't talk to him, and he fucks the Vocal Adrenaline lead singer before the show. She digs scratches down his back and so he slams her over, takes her from behind and she screams for him, and he smirks.

She misses a note; can't quite get there.

They win Regionals, and Rachel hugs him until she forgets that they're broken up.

He sort of expects a fallout, but the chick would get kicked off the team if she admitted, so he gets away with it.

"You're not fighting for her," Artie says, frowning at him while they're just playing around with their guitars at lunch—weather's turned nice, so everyone's outside eating.

"Fought for her at the start, and I'm not the one who ditched," he replies, shrugging and squinting. She's wearing bright blue undies and a white skirt, and Jewfro extraordinaire is hitting on her, and sporting wood. He wants to commit mass acts of violence, but whatever.

"You're right," Artie agrees, speculatively.

Puck should have known shit was going to go down.

* * *

"Mr. Schuester? I have prepared a ballad for Nationals, if I could perform it?" she asks. She's smoothing her skirt down, and everyone nods enthusiastically.

Shue shifts Holly in his arms and smiles and nods, and the kid at the piano strikes up the first few notes.

Puck gives Santana a look, because she's kinda trustworthy. She smirks at him.

"[Only One Road](http://www.mediafire.com/?cwiyyznwayr), by the incomparable Celine Dion," Rachel says. And then she's singing to him. _Right_ to him, and she's totally open because that's what she _does_ and Artie nudges him and he covers his face because Jesus Christ, Glee has just turned into My Big Fat Greek Wedding and _oh my god_ he has to stop watching fucking movies, okay? He just does. "But I want to run back, I want to run back, 'cause I need you right here beside me" she sings.

And Finn shifts, and says, "Dude, that's like, it."

So Puck gets up and he kisses her, because he gives up—he's trapped in a musical teenaged movie. Whatever, he yields.

"I'm sorry I overreacted," she says.

"Yeah," he agrees. "You're kind of a drama queen."

She gapes at him, and he kisses her again, even with Schue muttering behind them and covering Holly's eyes.

Whatever.

It'll work.

* * *

_Eleven Years Later…_  
Holly Fabray-Hudson never met her maternal grandparents: they kicked her mom out of the house when she found out she was pregnant. Lima, Ohio is a random spot on a map, far far away from Manhattan. A place they go to visit Grandma, but lately she's been visiting them, so it works.

Her dad and her mom married like, five years after she was born, once they were both done with college and figured they were sort of stuck with each other. Holly was a flower girl. Dad teaches music in Long Island public schools, comes home tired but ridiculously enthusiastic. He's always kind of rumpled, which is funny because Mom wears black suits and heels and she's always so… Manhattan. And Dad is so not.

 

Right now they're at the theatre, watching _Wicked_. Aunt Rachel is Elphaba—the role that got her her first Tony when she was 19—and Mercedes is Galinda. Mom says they had to change a few lyrics. Dad tells mom to be nice, and Holly tells them both to shush.

Aunt Rachel is all lit up on stage, singing, "And nobody, in all of Oz, no wizard that there is or was, is ever gonna bring…..me down!"

She does movies, now, and has released albums that got Grammys, but she says Broadway is her best love. It's kinda easy to see, with how lit up she is. But she's determined to get an Oscar, so who knows. Of course, she's not even thirty yet, so.

"How's it going?" Uncle Puck asks.

"You're seriously showing up at the end of the first act?" Dad hisses. Uncle Puck looks at him: he's still kind of dirty and his face is a little scraped up. He must have come straight from the airport.

"How many times do I have to watch this fucking show?" Uncle Puck demands.

"Puck!" Dad hisses, jerking his head at Holly, and Uncle Puck winks at her. Uncle Puck is kind of a badass. He's Navy, but Navy medics patch up Marines, and Uncle Puck is really good at browbeating Marines into sitting down, shutting up, and letting him get to work. Holly doesn't know all the details, but she's got a Google Alert for Aunt Rachel and Uncle Puck, and Uncle Puck is in some really scary stuff.

"Oh my god, could you all please be quiet?" Kurt demands. Kurt is a fashion designer—he does big shows, and some magazine said he was the freshest thing of the decade, so now Mom says he's unbearable. Kurt takes Holly out shopping, and she always looks awesome. Plus he like, gives her stuff. So she's not breaking the bank or anything.

"Chill out, flamer," Santana says. She's a lawyer at Mom's firm. Her wife, Brittany, is kind of ridiculously stupid, but she's a Manhattan Wife, which apparently means something. Holly doesn't even know—right now she's gripping her seat like she's never seen a curtain go down before, and then the house lights go up for the intermission.

Matt is down on stage—or well, he will be: he's Fiyero, and Mike went to the bathroom like, an hour ago and isn't back yet, so he's either on the phone with his agent or he's avoiding watching his husband kiss women. Either way.

Artie stretches and says something to Tina, who is his partner but not his wife, because they don't believe in marriage, and then he touches her belly. She's having twins, and she swears at him a lot and wears combat boots: sometimes Uncle Puck even brings them back for her.

See, Mom says that they were all Gleeks, and now they have a bond, and she will never be rid of these people, even a decade later. And they all do come down to the city every so often and there's tons of singing in the penthouse and laughing and old stories of Heath Ledgering and Kurt taking the girls shopping.


End file.
